there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
