So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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