Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
