hotel room ftw
brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize