Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
