I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
