Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
