I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
