I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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