you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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