hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
