I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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