You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize