We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
