When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
