I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
He? As in you personified your dick?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
