someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
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