what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
