I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
