The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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