Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
