try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
