If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
