Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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