I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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