Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
