you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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