That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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