I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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