I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
