As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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