yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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