Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
