I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
