Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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