So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
