What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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