You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
