My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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