youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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