I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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