I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
