Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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