just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
