I just made out with a guy for $7.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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