im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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