I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
