we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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