at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
