I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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